Portrait of a Lukewarm Apology to Long Island

It’s true that, in the past, I’ve said some unflattering things about Long Island. Things like:

“It’s a 118 mile long shopping plaza.”

“It’s a 118 mile long parking lot.”

“I don’t understand how there are enough people in America, never mind in Long Island alone, to keep this many nail salons and tattoo parlors in business.”

“It’s a 118 mile long commercial for men’s hair gel.”

“There are only two things that I like about it, and that’s because I’m generous enough to make ‘pizza’ and ‘Italian food’ two separate categories.”

(The last one isn’t quite true. There are actually four things that I like about Long Island, but the comedic timing works better with the symmetry of two.)

Today, I (gulp) want to give Long Island some credit.

It is possible to find natural beauty on Long Island, if you know where to look. Take the following photos:

Now you might be thinking, “Okay, but these photos were taken on the North Fork. That’s practically a different planet from the rest of Long Island.”

I’d have to agree with you there.

But consider these photos taken not a mile from my apartment:

Yup. Beauty. On Long Island. It’s true.

So I hope you’ll forgive me for my sometimes negative portrayal of the area. It isn’t all bad.

But it isn’t all great, either.

For instance, this is what I’d always thought a sunrise looked like:

And this is what Long Island calls Sunrise Highway:

But at the end of the day, at least I don’t live in New Jersey.

(kidding, kidding)


4 thoughts on “Portrait of a Lukewarm Apology to Long Island

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